Yesterday, it was 5th November 2010 it is the happiest day for my Indian frens i went to Mid Valley with my baby he went to meet his fren while as usual i went for shopping..at first we went to the PC Expo together n thought of buying the GPS, but i insist tht let me think about it first...den he gone to delicious with his primary schoolmates they are having gathering..i continued my 'journey' eating and shopping...i bought sum things for myself and after tht thought of buying sum pressie for him since his b'day is just around the corner but out of sudden my neck feels pain so i decided to go n find him, juz too worry about myself..he asked me so how is my decision wan or not the GPS i wan it but our credit card lacked of credit coz of me bought my stuff using the card..so i went to try, ends at it appears CARD DECLINE so i came back on the way he told me tht his frens are changing location to other place he is waiting for me so i walked really fast and mistakenly took wrong escalator juz dunwan him to wait..
Then, we went over to The Gardens Zouk's cafe for drink with his fellow frens, from here the bad day of me STARTED...his guy frens requested to open Jack Daniels so i drank a small portion with mixture (coke), only about 2 cups felt so sleepy, feels bad drink alcohol but got sleepy instead of drunk..sigh :(
he keeps talking to his fren while i'm alone by myself ntg to do, feel stupid sitting there...so i took my bad n went to the toilet on the way out i was almost falled as i couldn't c there's a stair there...indication tht i'm kinda DRUNK hahhaha...after came out from the washroom i choose nt to go back as i felt redundant ntg to do nobody is toking to me feel tht i'm da extra one inside there..i was sitting on the public sofa thinking is this wat the usual and ordinary ppl say 'mis-communication' due to the diff job and frens u have...my tears started to drop but i told myself i can't cry i have to b strong it is in the public not my hse...i have been waited for about 30 mins den we decided to leave..i was so upset tht feeling redundant by my loved one..
This morning i was about to tell him da yesterday prob, ends up i was crying so sadly i was thinking of leaving him n go oversea to study but i noe tht is so impossible i dunwan to feel apart from him...he is the only guy which i rely on the most..i felt so depressed , lost and i dunno wat i should do?????
We past lots of 'stage' before we have today, u told me v r goin to marry once i finish my LLB degree but now seems like everything is goin our from our plan...every year da same mth v wil fight for the same issue...i'm so tired thought of wanting a clear break off, but u told me u wan sum time to think about it hw should u do, i noe tht if wan to break off i would suffer alot..instead of being suffered day, nite i prefer to have a short term pain...
Baby do u noe i'm so into u, i couldn't juz by 1 or 2 sentence leave u...i choose to take external programme juz because of 1 simple reason i dunwan to b apart from u..my heart juz dun beat normally now, i have lost appetite to eat dun feel hungry...tears seem to juz unstoppable..
Our b'day is juz right the corner can v come back together as usual?? our little son Abie's bday is juz next wednesday r u coming to find us??????
How about our bday r u gonna to celebrate with me???
I'M SO LOST
