The Temporary 'Cold War'

Yesterday, it was 5th November 2010 it is the happiest day for my Indian frens i went to Mid Valley with my baby he went to meet his fren while as usual i went for shopping..at first we went to the PC Expo together n thought of buying the GPS, but i insist tht let me think about it first...den he gone to delicious with his primary schoolmates they are having gathering..i continued my 'journey' eating and shopping...i bought sum things for myself and after tht thought of buying sum pressie for him since his b'day is just around the corner but out of sudden my neck feels pain so i decided to go n find him, juz too worry about myself..he asked me so how is my decision wan or not the GPS i wan it but our credit card lacked of credit coz of me bought my stuff using the card..so i went to try, ends at it appears CARD DECLINE so i came back on the way he told me tht his frens are changing location to other place he is waiting for me so i walked really fast and mistakenly took wrong escalator juz dunwan him to wait..

Then, we went over to The Gardens Zouk's cafe for drink with his fellow frens, from here the bad day of me STARTED...his guy frens requested to open Jack Daniels so i drank a small portion with mixture (coke), only about 2 cups felt so sleepy, feels bad drink alcohol but got sleepy instead of drunk..sigh :(
he keeps talking to his fren while i'm alone by myself ntg to do, feel stupid sitting there...so i took my bad n went to the toilet on the way out i was almost falled as i couldn't c there's a stair there...indication tht i'm kinda DRUNK hahhaha...after came out from the washroom i choose nt to go back as i felt redundant ntg to do nobody is toking to me feel tht i'm da extra one inside there..i was sitting on the public sofa thinking is this wat the usual and ordinary ppl say 'mis-communication' due to the diff job and frens u have...my tears started to drop but i told myself i can't cry i have to b strong it is in the public not my hse...i have been waited for about 30 mins den we decided to leave..i was so upset tht feeling redundant by my loved one..

This morning i was about to tell him da yesterday prob, ends up i was crying so sadly i was thinking of leaving him n go oversea to study but i noe tht is so impossible i dunwan to feel apart from him...he is the only guy which i rely on the most..i felt so depressed , lost and i dunno wat i should do?????
We past lots of 'stage' before we have today, u told me v r goin to marry once i finish my LLB degree but now seems like everything is goin our from our plan...every year da same mth v wil fight for the same issue...i'm so tired thought of wanting a clear break off, but u told me u wan sum time to think about it hw should u do, i noe tht if wan to break off i would suffer alot..instead of being suffered day, nite i prefer to have a short term pain...

Baby do u noe i'm so into u, i couldn't juz by 1 or 2 sentence leave u...i choose to take external programme juz because of 1 simple reason i dunwan to b apart from u..my heart juz dun beat normally now, i have lost appetite to eat dun feel hungry...tears seem to juz unstoppable..

Our b'day is juz right the corner can v come back together as usual?? our little son Abie's bday is juz next wednesday r u coming to find us??????
How about our bday r u gonna to celebrate with me???



I'M SO LOST

The Guy that Accompany me for 4 years

Our story starts with the viewing of the fireworks in The Curve in the year 2006, it was the very first time of mine to watch the fireworks lively..The first time i was hug by a guy who is not my boyfriend(bf) but curiously i did not resist; the hug that he gave me was really different from those(my-exs) that had before. it makes me fall in love with him at the moment.This guy should i titled him as 'stupid'? He was in love with me from the first few time we met, but he knew that i wasn't fond with him but fond in his best fren, no matter when i wanna see his best fren or met his best fren he will juz be my 'driver' anytime , anyday, within 24 hours. Now i think it back he is not stupid he is juz doing sumthing for the person he loves; now he gots the reward, that i have choosen him at last because the effort, time and love that he have been sacrify for me i was touched. Obviously it is not the feeling of touching i'm in love with him, i knew i found the 'right man' i should be for my life. Someone might think it is too fast to make up the decision to be with a person for the rest of your life, but do you know that 'right man/woman' only appears once in your life, once it is gone that's it, it would not appear another time. Therefore, i choose to appreciate what i have now,than thinking for a better one, i believe that in this world nobody is perfect as what u think, if u need a perfect man then he couldn't be a man because human would makes mistake, only mistake can makes u realized how much you have learn for your life.  I believe that in relationship there is 'not whether who is more compatible with who', it is the matter of 'APPRECIATE'.

This guy also makes mistake before which i thought i would never forgive him. But i have choose to forgive him because i appreciate what i have and i have learn from that incident that to be together it is not an easy task, u need lots of effort to understand each other and communication with each other is important. I used to be very arrogant and i wish my 'boy' would listened whatever i said. If u don't i would be really pissed off, but when i am with him i was taught by him it is not the right way to communicate with each other. Although most of the time we would have a tough fight / argue before we could listen to each other, but it usually ends up lovely.

I can said that he is not just my boyfriend , he is my lifetime teacher. I remembered during my A level i failed my exam twice which causes me in  hard time, he is the one who gave me support and encouraged me to do it again for the third time and i passed it. I was really happy and of course i shared this new with him. Although he said nothing but i could see from his eyes and expression that he does felt happy. All he wants is to see my smile all the time no matter how hard he works as long he sees my smile then is worth it. He told me before i am the only gal who makes him feel hard to let go and  he wants to be with me all the time, it might be juz sum sweet words but i love to hear it.. I'm sure that in this huge world no gals, ladies, women who does not like to hear 'sweet words' from their loved ones.

5th September 2010, it is our 4th year anniversary.. This is the first time we celebrated it in other place. Because we have budget this year hahahahah..sound funny..this year we celebrate in Port Dickson The Legend Water Chalet, it was awesome and i feel really happy and it is unbelievable that we had been through for 4 years.. the chalet build on the water and you can even viewed the sea through a piece of solid glass in the washroom..Time flies, we only spend a nite there the morning came really fast and we start to move ahead..we went to the Ostrich farm it was really funny we drove passed the place but couldn't find it till we have passed it like 8 km then we were curious that why we couldn't see anything. Ends up we decided to ask the police, but it seems that the police wasn't that clear also...hahaha then we managed to find it..RM 8 entry fees, and RM 2 for the Ostrich food..we bought one it was funny because he starts to feed the Ostrich and we were afraid and shocked by the way Ostrich ate the food..then is my turn it was worse when the Ostrich starts eating eventually i throw the entire tupperware..i was shocked, the Ostrich looked at me as if i m crazy..we reached KL at about 4..that's the end of our 'honeymoon'